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Wednesday, June 3, 2009

What A Difference A Year Makes

Take a gander over to the right. Notice that we are now TEN days away from our due date! Scroll down a bit and you'll also notice that my blogoversary is in seven days!

When I first started this little dog and pony show I never imagined how much could change in a year. And, ironically enough, I started the blog to document what I thought were big changes--the move to Chicago, Ricky's new job, my (now defunct) job hunt. You know--new city, new friends, new adventures.

Little did I know the adventures we'd be having! Especially since this time last year we didn't think this was an adventure we would ever get.

Four years ago Ricky and I really wanted a baby. For a year we tried and we tried but it just didn't happen. So we did all the testing. The not-fun, invasive testing, which only adds insult to injury by telling you at the end that it's probably never going to happen. We were devastated.

At the time I was part of a message board of other women trying to have babies and what I noticed was that when other couples got a similar diagnosis, their lives (the women especially) were suddenly CONSUMED with having a baby. They would do whatever it took, pay whatever they had to pay, only sleep with their husbands when they were ovulating, because they didn't want to "waste" anything.

I knew I didn't want that to become us. Ricky and I had a great life--we adored each other, had jobs we loved, awesome friends and family. Yes, we wanted something that we might not ever have, but that didn't negate all the good in our life. So we got some perspective. If someday we had a baby, great. If not, our lives were pretty fantastic anyway.

Now before I start sounding like Pollyanna, let me assure you there were times when we were still sad. Times when I was so jealous of friends who got pregnant on their first try that I could have turned green with envy. But we really worked on it not changing us as a couple. Or if it did change us, we tried to let it bring us closer together.

And slowly but surely it got easier. We still thought about it from time to time and discussed other options, but we didn't pine for it like we once had.

Fast forward to last year--we moved to Chicago, excited about starting new lives in a big city, not thinking babies AT ALL and BAM! I'm pregnant. We were thrilled, but we were also terrified. This was no longer part of our plan, at least not now. Ricky was swamped with his new job. We were at a place (finally!) to really pay down some debt. I was planning on giving the old theatre career another go. And we're having a baby NOW???

(I know, I know. I go back and read that last paragraph and realize how ridiculous it sounds. After years of wanting something, we finally get it and we have the nerve to question it??? Forgive us, we were a little overwhelmed.)

And then, we had our first doctor's appointment and saw our little guy for the 1st time. And we realized--yes, we should be having a baby, THIS baby, now.

Three years ago as we went through the testing I never could have imagined this. Last year as I started this blog and prepared to move to Chicago I never could have imagined this.

So now I can only wonder, what will the next year bring? I do know I can't wait to find out.


Camily said...

I'm crying now. What a great year--just wait for the next one! LOVE YOU!

TNBuckeye said...

Great blog Lucy! I know you are excited and nervous! Here's hoping (for your sake) that Lil Ricky makes an early appearance!

Tiana said...

Oh how I am so happy for you. Good things come to those who wait. This is going to be the best part of your lives; what an adventure you are about to have. Yay!

Lesli said...

I know!!! So much can happen & change in a year. I remember when you started your blog and sent me a message about reading mine--telling me you were moving to Chicago & starting this blog to document things, right? Anyhow, this is a really exciting time for you, and I know many more years of fun and change and excitement are coming!

Andie said...

Congratulations! thanks for stopping by my place!

Bobby said...

Lucy this post was a real winner. I got a little teary eyed at the end. Just today on my drive home from work I was thinking about what life was like a year ago myself. Did I think I'd be a dad? Actually no. I expected us to sink a ton of cash into this adoption thing and then just never see it again...but here we are changing diapers. You're right...what a difference a year can make.

Pop over to my site and email me your address if you can...we are gathering a little something for little Ricky (we kinda need to know his real name though...but I promise I won't tell!)

Kristi Stevens said...

Lucy, Just wait. The next year will be even more surprising - and wonderful. I won't lie. The first year is a challenge - the first six weeks is a blur. But, one morning you'll wake up BEFORE the baby and think "wow, we're a family". Congratulations. I assure you this will be well worth the wait.

Alicia said...

Hi! I saw you on BPOTW....how exciting! Congrats! It's amazing how having a child just changes every aspect of your life! I can't wait to see what changes are in store for your growing family!!

Jeve (aka John and Steve) said...

Congrats on the baby!

Visiting from BPOTW. Nice post!


Mighty M said...

It might bring a little less sleep, but it will be SO wonderful!!! :-)

BPOTW said...

Congrats on your great post and news!

And thanks for linking with BPOTW this week!

Maggi said...

What a wonderful story to share with others and congratulations! And the blogaversary and the Little Ricky!

Jess Noel said...

Wow...this one made me cry. Love to you and your little family, Lucy!

Meredith said...

I'm so glad to have made your recent acquaintance, Lucy. This post was so very touching, and it's wonderful that you decided to share. I cannot wait for Little Ricky to arrive and form your little family. Now, being on the other side, there is NOTHING that compares to that feeling.

Happy blogiversary, and sending labor thoughts your way!