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Saturday, October 3, 2009

Sarah Jessica Parker is a stronger woman than I am!

Remember this post where I asked for advice on what to wear home from the hospital after Little Ricky was born? In it I mentioned how I'd love to be like Sarah Jessica Parker and come home dressed to kill, in heels and full hair and make-up, but I wasn't sure how realistic that was.

Well, now that I've experienced the whole delivery thing, all I have to say is how in the hell did she do that??? Make-up? Hair done? A dress? HEELS????

Obviously, I opted for my comfy outfit of track pants, hoody and Croc flip-flops. (I know, I know. Crocs are hideous, but don't judge me. I had just squeezed a ginormous baby out of my hoo-ha.)

I knew I would be tired after having Ricky but no one tells you that after having a baby your legs will be jelly. You will feel like you have run 15 marathons in a row!

And because of those jelly legs, you will have all sorts of fun experiences. Like...

--Getting out of bed will take several minutes as you first give yourself a pep talk that yes, you can stand up. Then a few more minutes as you maneuver yourself into a sitting position (your arms will also be pretty jelly-ish making pushing yourself up REAL fun.) Once sitting, you will have to take a minute to catch your breath and then slowly but surely push yourself up and hope to God your legs hold!

--After almost 9 1/2 years of convincing my husband that I was a delicate flower who never peed or pooped, that would all go out the window when I had to call him into the bathroom the day after Little Ricky was born to help me off of the potty. (Sexy, huh?)

So as you can see from all of that, heels were not really an option for me. Unless SJP's son just magically appeared I don't understand how they were an option for her either. I can only imagine that as she smiled for the paparazzi on the outside, she was screaming in fatigue on the inside.

Maybe this is one of those times when being rich and famous doesn't really work in your favor!


LucyCooper said...

Heels? Really? God, get over yourself SJP! That's just irritating and show off-y. As for Croc flip flops, when I went home after I gave birth last December, I wore Crocs with the furry lining. Heaven for my swollen, cold feet.
Also, I worked as an aide on a labor and delivery unit for 5 years. If someone had tried to wear heels home, I would have probably insisted that she take them off.

injaynesworld said...

I bet that wasn't even SJP. I bet it was a stand-in all made up to look like her. At least that's what I would like to think. ;) - Jayne

Beth said...

great post! i like the pp's comment, it probably was a stand in! I cant imagine going through those extremes just too look good for the paparrazzi!

terry said...

ok. I just found your BLOG through Divine Caroline. You are really funny. I am at such a different stage in the parenting process. But we have a similar sensibility. Keep writing!

Jess Noel said...

Keep this advice comin' lady :) I'm really digging it!! I feel more prepared every time I read your blog.

StacieinAtlanta said...

She probably wore heels for two minutes while pictures were being taken and then seriously thrown them out the car window on the way home.